Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
