Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
