the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize