Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
