We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
wanna go halves on a baby?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
