your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
