btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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