both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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