So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize