i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
it's like heaven, but drunker
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
