dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
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What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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