They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
