Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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