so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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