Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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