roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
