it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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