My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
