That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
