playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
