i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It's just like the Real World with babies
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Randomize
