i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
