there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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