Whatcha textin bout Willis?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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