Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
