But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
