Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
