Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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