she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Randomize
