I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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