I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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