i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
