Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize