I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
