plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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