Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
