There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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