its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
