There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
