been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
