forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
