We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My ATM looks so different sober.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Drunk is not a location!
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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