she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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