There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
