i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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