I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
