Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
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