he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
There are leaves in my underwear?
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