butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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