I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
