I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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