Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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