I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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